M and I attended the Boston leg of the Josh Groban tour several Tuesdays ago. Josh Groban, for those of you who are not familiar, is a singing sensation, a 22 year old classically trained tenor. He has a rich voice and can sing believably in English, French, Spanish and Italian. Lots of ballads, that kind of thing. His latest album, Closer, jumped to number one on the pop chart in January. He was on the 2001 season finale of Ally McBeal. At the Superbowl this year, he sang a tribute to the NASA Columbia crew. That was the first time I had seen and heard him, and the only Superbowl thing I saw. Mid-song, a spaceman came out and walked around on something that was made to look like a moon. That was unfortunate, I thought, but in retrospect, it was the regular kind of embarassment that could happen to anyone. While we all might obsess about our clothing "falling off" at an inopportune moment, most of us are more likely to fall prey to situations out of our control. Bad sets, I mean.
Josh has great hair. If we were in the same high school, he and I would be in separate but overlapping spheres. I�d think him a band geek, even if he wasn�t with the band, but just because I saw him come out of the music room. I had no business in there and I just lumped all the music room people together with the marching band people. I painted broad in those days. I was a library geek and that�s where our spheres would overlap. I�d be at my table and he�d be in the more open area where the brains would be, because he would be a brainy guy too. I�d see him and put him in a space in my mind: a cute guy, really smart, band geek, cute, okay. I might have a tiny crush on him when I passed him on the stairs and maybe we exchanged hi�s.
At a party in our senior year, we�d both get a little loose. He�d come over after John H. told me what ripping labels off beer bottles means. �It means I�m horny,� John said, ripping his label in front of me. John was in my math class and took many more liberties than he was due. I smile, showing no teeth and Josh comes by casually. My drink of choice in those days was Mountain Dew so I wasn�t exactly loose, just more fizzy. Josh would have some Dew without making it seem stupid and John H. would disappear. Thank you.
How did I end up at the Wang Center in very very good seats, watching this young man, who I did not go to high school with, who in fact is young enough to be my son? Even more of a question is how did M end up there with me? M listens to OutKast and Public Enemy and recently, Muddy Waters� Electric Mud album.
The answer is Tariqh Akoni. Tariqh plays guitar and is touring with Josh. I knew Tariqh when he played at Wally�s in Boston. Tariqh is the reason I stood up and screamed. I did not scream for Josh. He�s a nice kid, loads of talent. But he�s no Tariqh. And Josh is not married to a very good friend of mine, as Tariqh is. I also doubt he would look as good in leather pants or bald.
Plus, Josh has his fans. Hundreds of thousands of them. They call themselves Grobanites. That�s unfortunate, I think, but it obviously makes these women happy. A majority of Grobanites are women in their 40s, 50s, and up. Sadly some of them may concoct fantasies of being in high school with Josh. More sad, perhaps, is that some of them follow him on his tour. They don�t want to be called groupies. They want a more solid, connected name. Hence Grobanite. That's solid! It sounds like the name of the people inhabiting a planet encountered on Star Trek: Next Generation.
Here's an excerpt from an interview with the likeable Josh (sorry, I lost the source):
--What is your favourite TV Show? Goodness. The Simpsons. Its not just a cartoon.
--What would you do if they asked you to be a guest character?I would drop EVERYTHING.
-- What would the story be? Singing while Lisa plays saxophone? I don�t know � anything! A duet with Mo!
--Who is your favourite character? The comic store guy. He never gets enough air time I think.
Please note the use of the word �goodness.� That�s something for a pop star. Take that, Big Boi.
Thanks for Kristin and Tariqh for the screams!
